Sini recoils in horror at the idea of sex education for kindergarteners. "They're too young!" she exclaims. Mother of a 4 1/2 year old boy, she is fuming at the recent decision by the Central Board of Secondary Education to introduce sex education for children as young as 3 years.
Psychotherapist Niloufer Ebrahim says, "The problem is, the moment people hear the word "sex", they think of two people doing something. They do not realize that this is more about self-awareness." About Sini's response, Ebrahim says, "She is frightened, because she thinks her 4 1/2 year old is going to be taught how to do it! He is not."
According to Ebrahim, ideally sex education would be imparted to kids in very small increments, in an age-appropriate manner, taking into account the levels of understanding of the children.
Ebrahim says, "Done right, it would start with making children sensitive to the differences between men and women, an awareness of hygiene. Gradually, as the children got older, they would be more aware of their bodies, and bodily changes, which should be normal and not something to be ashamed of." She says, "There would have to be awareness of so many things before we even touch what we call "sex"."
Sex education would help children recognize sexual abuse, by teaching them to distinguish between "good" touch or "bad". Ebrahim says, "Kids need to be taught that if anybody touches them in areas that are covered by clothes, it is not acceptable. That if such a thing were to happen, they should tell." Unfortunately though, there is a common perception that such things do not happen in "good" families.
About the general disbelief that boys can be molested too, Ebrahim says, "Yes,boys do get molested, by other males, by females. Mostly, the molester is known to the family; it is person who you probably care for very much, or consider part of your family."
Ebrahim says emphatically, "One thing we must remember, just because you teach a person what sex is, doesn't mean they will run out and have sex. You know that if you take a knife and stab somebody; you can kill that person, does not mean you go get a knife and stab somebody."
India Today recently did a survey about children today being sexually active from a very early age. With AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases becoming a hard reality, to not make these kids aware of responsible sexual behaviour, and the use of condoms, is an epidemic waiting to happen. Ebrahim says grimly. "They are likely to get diseases, they are likely to get pregnant. People are using plastic bags, can you imagine? Milk bags instead of condoms?"
Published in The Times of India, Pune Edition
Friday, Nov 10, 2006
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